♥.Crystal Clear.♥

All posts now on shinyadesu account.

x

Just a quick update, most posts in now in private journal.
I really need to work on my communities, as I've been reminded - will do that as soon as possible.
<lj user="_dreamweavers" claim's list needs updating really badly, I need anyone who I missed off the list to leave a comment. Ja x

I'm only making a proper entry in my private journal today so... oh have come Meev lyrics.

Hidoi yo, mama
Fukanzen naru hora, hidoi aza darake, godai ha fuman
Temonakereba ashi mo nae
ima mo mukashi mo nita keshiki
dosu kuroi heya
kibou no ki no jisae doko ni mo ariyashi nae
Kuroi, cry, Kuroi, cry

So, yatto tsukanda nanairo no Feather
Father, moushiwakenai kedo
Tebanashi taku ha nai no sa
tashou no gisei ha o te no mono, nandaro?
Tonari ni aru no ha otouto ka imouto ka...

Sorry my baby, it's my own fault.
Allow me ratting on you.
I've nothing to lose
Oh, I feel lonely...

Zubutoi, zubutoi, anata to no kizuna ha
Masshiroi youfuku kita aitsu ni setsurarete
hai, sayonara
iinda, iinda, sou nozomu no ha, nozomurenu boku
Tatoe hitoribocchi demo ikinagaraete yaru sa.

Hey my mother, what are you getting at?
Put a sock in it
Okay, suit yourself.
I miss you too, mum...

I've been posting mostly in my private journal so... apologies.

Well, my net connection is fucked, my computer is heaving with spyware and adware... so I'd best go sort it out.

Ja ne minna-san. x

Apologies for the last of posting - had a little much on my mind lately.

I've not been well of late, both physically and mentally. It's not a nice feeling, especially when you are acutely aware of what may be causing it.

*sigh* Why me.

Well, I have to go out marching soon in the freezing cold, because it's the Transgender Day of Rememberance... finally.
*grabs rainbow flag*

I'm in a weird mood again. Well, when am I not?
I've been slapped in the face by someone I thought to be a friend - got a nice bruise from it too. *rolls eyes* Pathetic.
I've been sitting around doing very little - reading manga and browsing LJ and GJ mostly.
Meh. My life is so uninteresting.

~The chemicals between us, the walls that lie between us, lying in this bed...~

I'm in such a strange mood. I'm trying to stir up support for my 20th Nov. TG Day of Rememberance march - 7 people so far marching. Just 7.

I'm getting Gwen (gwenners) to put details on the DOR events list.... go to _rememberthem_ for links etc.

Well, Alice (littleshinya) showed me photos from her Sims2 game... Shinya X Kyo, Gackt X Mana... and Kyo X Gackt. Very disturbing...
But since I saw the photos, I've been trying to download the game. Only problem is, the version I downloaded gave my computer a major virus that my Etrust didn't block... IO obviously managed to fix it (or I wouldn't be writing in here), but it was so irritating.

Do you ever get the feeling you just want to give up? Like you've had enough of everythng and you just want to give up. I get too much verbal and physical abuse in this place - it's "faggot" this and "trannie" that. It's making me so angry and miserable, I just want to leave...

Well, I'm getting ready for the Transgender Day of Rememberance on the 20th... a few of my friends have decided not to go to college, and we're all going to wave the flag of rememberance. Literally.

There's also something I want someone, anyone, to talk with me about. For over a year now I've had huge problems with self-harm... I've hospitalized myself twice, and have thick scarring on my thighs, and scarring on my arms. I hadn't cut for three months, now all of a sudden I feel overwhelmed with things and have started again. I don't know what to do.

I'm still debating over whether to make shinyadesu my permanent journal... hmmm...

I think I may make my private journal shinyadesu my only journal... I hate this one.

Well, Keira [Unknown LJ tag] is coming to see me on Tuesday and staying 'til Thursady (yay). Fun.

I'm in love with an underage boy... help.